Oh yes. I thought I would not have any regrets about breastfeeding. But this Holy Week (and being Aria’s slave literally this week), I thought of this one regret: I did not plan to wean her off the breast!
At 31 months she still nurses as often as she can. Sure I don’t deny her of nursing, but then there are times that I wished she will learn not to nurse all the time when I am with her.
Let’s count the countless reasons of her nursing:
She might be thirsty. What’s water and milk and juice for, then? She’d rather nurse to quench her thirst after a yummy meal.
She might be hungry. But she has just eaten a full meal!!! Still, when she sees me, she’d nurse. Then give a very loud burp!
She might be sleepy. Which is always the case. But if I am not around, she doesn’t have a choice, that’s why naptime with my mom is a tedious task. That alone takes up hours of their day. In the evening, I try to train her not to nurse to sleep. It will be a 10% chance that she can do it, but most often she nurses. Lately the trick is she wants her feet under a pillow. As I have mentioned before, we don’t believe in sleep training. But I trust that when she turns three she can sleep alone without the aid of the boob.
She might be upset. Aria is quite insistent nowadays. She would repeatedly say what she wants until you give it to her. When you don’t give it to her, or take aways something from her, she cries, no, bawls. Really noisy girl.
She learned something new. As if a dog getting a reward, Aria rewards herself with nursing if she learned a new word, phrase, trick, or wanting to learn some more. Breastmilk might be her brain food as well, no wonder she can count up to 30 and count backwards from 10 to one, say the alphabet clearly, spell out words, read words and phrases, sing lots of songs,
memorize things easily. She also has good motor skills (like opening boxes, zippers, pulling and pushing, climbing cabinets, monkey bars. Yeah she is a boy! Kidding!).
Nothing. She just wants to. This is what I am still puzzled about. She would just sit on my lap, pull dwn or up my shirt, and nurse. She’d do it anywhere, anytime of the day. I would rather she nurse than roam around and shout and be noisy. She often smiles at me while nursing. How can I be angry, then? Big reward indeed.
Big question is, until when? I choose not to answer, because it breaks my heart everytime I pull her off my breasts. I feel the first part of the mission is done, that I will face so much more when she weans. I am scared to get to that stage.